Why You Won’t Locate Paedophiles in Your Area
10 April 2010Paedophiles are adults or older adolescents who are attracted to pre-pubescent children. Many parents wish to know if there is a paedophile in their area, and a number of people have found this website while searching for such information. The occurrence of paedophilia within the general population is higher than you might imagine; many paedophiles are not child molesters.
One of the many misconceptions about paedophilia is the belief that most paedophiles prefer to be “in the closet” or “in the toy box“, as if paedophiles are ashamed of their sexual orientation. Naturally, some paedophiles may be ashamed of their sexuality because of society’s attitudes towards people who are attracted to children. This feeling of shame over a hard-wired orientation is not shared by all paedophiles, however. Many paedophiles justifiably feel proud about having the levels of control necessary to behave responsibly, despite having a sexual orientation which will prevent the possibility of ever having a sexual partner.
Coming out as a paedophile is currently very dangerous in many developed countries, much like coming out as gay is dangerous in many Middle Eastern countries. The consequences of coming out, or being outed, may include physical and verbal abuse, loss of employment, vandalism to one’s property, false accusations of illegal behaviour, harassment and intrusion from law “enforcement” and alienation from friends and family. This article briefly discusses the stories of several people - including a 14 year old boy - who have been stalked and harassed simply because they had the bravery to discuss their sexual orientation.
In 2006, the sexual orientation of Dutch technical administrator and programmer Roderik Muit was widely publicised when he defended the pro-paedophile MARTIJN Association against questionable legal action, brought by a royal family who have been criticised for suing people in relation to dubious claims of breach of privacy. After defending the organisation in court, Roderik faced a barrage of unexpected questions from the media, who aired his name and image on national television. Following his outing, Roderik lost his job and parts of his social life, despite having never attempted to act on his attraction to children. The publicising of his sexual orientation, both in the mass media and vigilante websites, left him unable to find permanent work for two years, despite the fact that he possesses an excellent CV.
But Roderik is not the only non-offending person who has suffered harassment on the basis of his sexual orientation. In 2007, Jack McClellan was forced to leave his home after he was subjected to abuse for running a website which discussed public events at which one could legally admire children. He had also published pictures of fully-clothed girls, all of which were taken at public festivals and were not remotely pornographic. The media’s response was hysterical. Numerous news outlets described the website as a “how-to” for paedophiles, exploiting the public’s misinterpretation of “paedophilia” to falsely imply that Jack encouraged unethical and illegal activity. After being forced to leave his place of residence, Jack moved to another state, however he was then targeted by two lawyers. The lawyers filed for a restraining order, which forced Jack - who had never committed an offence of any kind - to stay over ten feet away from all children, meaning that he could be imprisoned if a child walked within ten feet of his car. The restraining order claimed that two teenage girls - who were older than the publicised ages of Jack’s interest - were frightened to attend public events as a result of Jack’s website. One of the involved attorneys even stated that they were “most fortunate” in obtaining the restraining order, which could be interpreted as an indication of the dishonesty of the claims which were made against Jack.
Later that year, Jack was asked to conduct an interview aside a high wall which, unbeknownst to him, adjoined a childcare facility at a university campus. The police were notified of Jack’s location and he was arrested on live television. Jack feels that the intention was to record a live arrest, not conduct an interview, but when someone is known to have a sexual orientation such as Jack’s, they will never be equal before the law.
In the Netherlands, Marthijn Uittenbogaard formed a political party, the PNVD, whose platform was most notable for calls for a modification of the age of consent and the legalisation of private possession of child pornography. The party’s other goals, which focused heavily on providing all people with basic civil liberties which are often ignored by the Dutch government, were overlooked by the media and vigilantes who engaged in a character assassination of Marthijn and other members.
Despite having never molested a child or committed any other offence, Marthijn was subjected to repeated attacks on his house, resulting in several broken windows, verbal assaults at the supermarket, and intimidation from vigilantes and even a biker gang. Another member of the PNVD, Norbert de Jonge, was forced to leave his course at university as a result of the formation of the party, and was refused admission to other universities on the basis of his sexual orientation and political ties, despite having never abused a child.
One of the most disturbing cases of attacks on responsible paedophiles is that of a teenager, who will be referred to as “Robert” to prevent his name being broadcast further. Robert was “stalked” online by vigilante organisation Perverted Justice from the age of 14, then outed to his family and church congregation. Not content with this, Perverted Justice also provided information for others who sought the underage person’s identity. After being outed, Robert was physically assaulted by his church’s pastor on account of his sexual orientation, even though he has never molested a child. When I sent an e-mail to ask about his experience of being outed, he began with the following statement:
“I was reluctent to even reply to your E-mail or even open the very first message you had sent me in fear that you were some Vigilanti. But I feel that it is important for people to know what happened. Honestly As I type this I’m thinking to myself why bother I’m getting panicy and my arms are shaking just by typing this message out. Discomfort from thinking about these events happens to me on a daily basis, I think about it til I get physically sick and end up having diarrhea.”
Robert was delighted when he finally persuaded his frightened mother to allow him to attend Church after he was outed to the congregation. He attended with his mother, and nothing was said about his sexual orientation at that time. Later that evening, when he attended a group for young members of the church without the presence of his mother, he was confronted by the Youth Pastor. Robert was lured into an office without any indication of what was about to happen. He provides the following account:
“I took a seat on the sofa in the Youth Office. The pastor sat in an office chair with wheels and proceeded to raise his voice. [….]He took misquotings that obviously were given to him via [a vigilante website] and yelled and I don’t mean loud I mean Yelling. [….]
I politly asked if I could get a drink (there was a mini-fridge stocked with soda at the other end of the room) and started to get up when I was blocked and slammed back into the Sofa by the senior pastor. I then after being in somewhat of a shock asked once again politly to get a drink in which I was denied. I then after feeling quite uncomfortable and panicy asked to leave the room so that I may call my mother. This was responded by the senior pastor with Violent Yelling, and Threatening to call the cops and have me arrested if I left the room. His Yelling Degenerated into slander and Verbal Assault. Calling me names such as but not limited to Child Rapist, Child Molester, Monster. ect. He Then left the room and order three other people to watch guard over me. (It felt as if I was being imprisioned in this office. [….]
I began sobbing uncontrolably and was probably histerical. Three more people showed up an equally violent and old man and two older women who began laughing and taunting at me because I was crying. I finally called my mother and was still sobbing uncontrollably on the phone asking for her to pick me up she finally did and that was the last time I ever went to that church.”
When you’re a minor who is simply attracted to younger minors, you don’t receive any protection from the authorities, even when you’re assaulted by a church pastor. Instead, the authorities join in with the harassment. When asked about how he was harassed by vigilantes, Robert described how the police colluded with vigilantes in order to harass him:
“They have sent fake letters to the police saying I’ve done this that or the other. or that I’m going to commit suicide in attempts to try to have cops arrest me. The Police activly began knocking on my door at all hours for quite some time and shining lights into my house even though they had no evidence to arrest me on anything they can still legally harass you for hours. This in itself was quite tramatising as I spent many nights sleeping in the bathroom to get away from all the police yelling and harassment at my door.”
Robert’s story is distressing, but it’s not the only such story. Indeed, there are hundreds of cases of innocent paedophiles suffering harassment, however documenting all of those cases would lead to an article of an unreadable length.
In a climate such as this, there is an obvious (but often overlooked) reason for people’s inability to locate paedophiles within their area. Most paedophiles will never out themselves due to the general population’s unwillingness to act sensibly upon the knowledge of their sexual orientation. Until people learn to not discriminate against a person on the basis of their sexual orientation, very few people will ‘come out’ as a paedophile. For a society which is so concerned about paedophiles, albeit as a result of misinformation and hysteria, this is a problem demanding serious consideration.
8 Responses to “Why You Won’t Locate Paedophiles in Your Area”
April 12th, 2010 at 11:00 am
The story about “Robert” is incredibly sad.
Please let everyone know who may be interested that there is now an online, positive Christian church for conscientious boylovers and their supporters and friends. Url is -www.cjat.org Queries can be addressed to me at bieytstemetet@live.co.uk (though response to email will not be rapid). The rules are as in any other church, so youth are welcome, but given the online situation, they are not allowed to reveal their identifying or specific locating information or to arrange to meet adult members in real life (no such attempt has been made; this is just a precaution).
God does has never had a problem with celibate boylovers, and there are some exciting things in Christianity for boylovers who have gone beyond the cliches.
I’ve had the pleasure of sharing an ale or two with Ro Muit and can attest that he’s a fine human being.
May 8th, 2010 at 8:25 pm
The writer is obviously a pedo…children are not ATTRACTED to adults. Nobody has a RIGHT to look at them sexually… Children are not play thingies…A child does not want you perverted attention…How dare you think you have the right to support “boylovers”. If any man or woman ever loved at my son, my innocent son, inappropriately I will shoot him through the head…the back of his head cause I dont want to see his/her evil eyes…
May 15th, 2010 at 1:40 pm
Being attracted to children is not a sexual orientation….it is a mental corruption. Somewhere along the way or from birth these people have bad wiring. It is predatory behavior to subject undeveloped children to such things. Christ even animals no better than to fuck there young. Disgusting….get help.
May 15th, 2010 at 2:47 pm
It seems that people posting comments on this article are unable to distinguish between fantasy and reality. That truly is disturbing. In posting such comments, said posters are reaffirming what I said in the final paragraph of this article.
Telling people to “get help” for an attraction to children is also rather naïve. A sexual attraction is hard-wired and will not change. Some people develop an attraction to adults when a child who they have fallen in love with becomes an adult, however the attraction to children doesn’t become obsolete. And nor should it, if one can control one’s behaviour (something at which paedophiles are particularly able). If somebody really wanted a paedophile to “get help”, they wouldn’t contribute to an environment in which discussing one’s attraction to children with another person leads to responses such as those found here.
In reality, many of the individuals who bully and behave agressively towards paedophiles have significant issues. It is the same behaviour which is found in schools, where children with significant issues become bullies and seek out the weakest child as a target for their bullying. Somebody does not become an acceptable target for bullying solely on the basis of who they are attracted to.
May 18th, 2010 at 6:16 am
I feel awful for those poor people. Being vandalized just for having a different sexual orientation is wrong and immoral.
People say that the West is becoming more liberal, when in reality, it’s not even halfway there yet.
Thankyou for posting such a wonderful article. Hopefully, it’ll make people think twice before bullying others.
May 20th, 2010 at 10:13 am
A fantasy is completely different from acting it out. Even the Catholic Church has no problem with homosexuals who do not actually act out their fantasies. The same with just about every other bizarre sexual fantasy. Make them as bizarre and twisted as you want, but as long as you keep them within the confines of your mind, it’s really no problem.
Now, some people go overboard and actually DO try to act them out. That’s part of the danger. But I would say that probably the majority of cases of abnormal attraction (such as to children), there is no overwhelming interest in actually carrying it out.
By the way, to whoever wrote this article: saying “Innocent” or “Responsible” paedophiles… is bizarre. I understand your meaning that you consider a paedophile ANYBODY who is attracted to children, whether they actually follow through with it or not. However, it hinders your meaning when you use it so broadly, since the commonly accepted image of a paedophile is somebody who actually abuses children. Perhaps you should use a word or set of words that doesn’t carry so much weight against the very people you are trying to protect, ok? We are not defending the abusers here
May 31st, 2010 at 8:53 am
What this so called perverted justice did to that poor teenager is disgusting. It shows the true perverse of their imaginary justice. That pastor ‘n co should be charged with the violent physical abuse of a minor!!! Perverted justice, amongst others, needs their own justice, before too many more innocents suffer to their flawed, evil and corrupt ideology.
July 26th, 2010 at 9:53 pm
Michelle-
You highlight a great point, that society at large equates “paedophilia” directly with child abuse. This is one of the grave misfortunes of our age. Paedophilia is a scientific term. Of all possible monikers, it should be the most neutral, the least offensive or controversial. This is one of the greatest hurdles to public education on both pedophiles and child molesters; when one definition inaccurately umbrellas the other, helpful knowledge and beneficial action by any party is crippled from the get-go. With such a stigmatising label, how many paedophiles would dare to reach out for help or support of any kind, to be a better functioning member of society, or a better partner for their spouse?
Let us remember that within groups of people of ALL sexual orientations/affiliations/persuasions there exists good and evil behaviour across a wide spectrum. Anyone can be a sexual abuser of anyone else, regardless of this affiliation. YES many abusers are paedophiles, and unfortunately children are an especially vulnerable population group. This is precisely why we must avoid the blind generalizations that undermine a truer understanding of our race, that should lead to better protection of the vulnerable in our societies.
While not a perfect analogy, a parallel could be using the words “soldier” and “murderer” or “war criminal” interchangeably. Not all soldiers are war criminals. Not all soldiers even kill, justly or otherwise. Many soldiers did not volunteer to be soldiers. Also, not all soldiers who DO kill do so with proper intentions. Sadly, many civilians have died at the hands and weapons of soldiers, sometimes (well, often, throughout history) intentionally. Let’s say John hates war criminals (a stretch, I know). He would be mistaken to verbally or otherwise attack soldiers at large, though some of them may be guilty of this label. While a soldier convicted of a war crime would still identify himself as a soldier, his non-criminal soldier brethren would not identify with him. Indeed, would they not resent being categorized as a war criminal by John, when they, under similar circumstances as the criminal, they made a deliberate effort to act justly? Now, if society at large equates soldiering to war criminalization or murder, what soldier would dare to wear his uniform in public, though there be no reason necessarily for shame? If the justice system mirrored the public’s outcry, how would justice be served by treating common soldiers and war criminals alike? It would be like punishing a frightened 17-year-old Nazi soldier in a foxhole for the Holocaust in the same manner as Hitler. (Sorry to play the Hitler card, and mix wars, and again I know it’s not the best analogy. Finally, I truly mean no disrespect to the armed forces; that’s sort of my whole point)
No, we’re not defending the abusers here. But IMO the language of “paedophile” (with whatever qualification you’d like to add) vs. “abuser” is AND MUST BE used scientifically and unambiguously for informed dialogue and useful change.
I charge everyone to please do what you can to remove the stigma of scientific terms such as “paedophile” (I’m sure there are many others), that people may save their righteous anger for those who actually would touch/harm children, and their grace (or at least a passive tolerance) for those whose expressions of honesty, humility, discipline, and accountability warrant no more condemnation than the condemning.
Simply put: be aware, and take care.